Pure Joy
I can’t stop laughing! Actually, I’ve been laughing a lot lately…even silently…as if my soul is laughing inside. Laughing with joy!
My grin would be the envy of a cheshire cat! It’s even past from ear to ear because of my God Who is such an awesome, good God! Praise the Lord for He is the mighty King of Zion! Praise His Holy Name! He is King of kings and Lord of lords! The Lion from the tribe of Judah! Loving, glorious God! Honor, praise and glory belongs to Him! Wisdom and power be to our God forever and ever! Amen.
I praise Him for His refiner’s fire. The tears I shed last week were tears borne from a deep understanding of God’s love and plan for me. He has taken every single thing in my life–all the good, the bad and the ugly– and has fashioned a beautiful, colorful tapestry that weaves a story about His light and love. My past, present and future now make so much sense to me, how closely connected everything that ever was, is and will be. I can see clearly now how every single little thing that happened, is happening and will happen is precious to Him. Nothing is wasted in God’s hands. Not even the deadliest sin or the darkest pain. He gently takes them and lovingly molds them after His fashion, like a potter with his clay. The result is a beautiful vessel of His life, faith, and hope not just for me but, more importantly, for others as well.
Last Sunday, I went to the first women’s mini-conference for all the women of the Couples for Christ ministries (wives of CFC, and ladies of Singles for Christ (SFC) and Handmaids of the Lord) along with my other SFC sisters. The theme was "Pure and Joyful". I looked forward to spending time with my lovely sisters and being nourished by the talks.
On our way there, we found out through a phone call that they needed another sharer. Upon hearing this, I immediately felt warm and tingly all over. My heart started pounding against my chest. I knew without a doubt that God was calling. Then one of my sisters asked, "Would you like to give a sharing, Rio?"
After a few seconds of wondrous silence I yelled in the car, "YES, LORD! YES, LORD! YES, LORD!" We all started laughing in joy and felt our souls praising God.
Praise God, indeed! He had been working on my heart so much that I didn’t even complain about not having enough time to prepare! In that moment I just understood that I had to obey. In that space of a second, I also understood even more deeply Jesus as the Way, the Truth and the Life; His great love for all of humanity and His dream to gather us all back to Him–a Father missing all of His children.
Of course, I was nervous, and not sure of what to share even when I had already given the main speaker a gist of my sharing before the conference started. But more than my nervousness, I felt His awesome, powerful Presence. My knees trembled. I sought my sisters and asked them to pray over me. I also asked Mother Mary, model of purity and joyfulness, to lend me her Fiat ("Let it be done") for Mother Mary can always be relied upon to perpetually help us in following God’s will. Her obedience to God, her human willingness to say, "Let it be done unto me according to your word, " is a fountain of strength for all to drink from. It raises up our souls to submit to God’s will.
When I got on the stage, my nerves started settling down. I did the sign of the cross before facing the almost 250 women and a handful of men in the audience. As I turned around to face them, a solid confidence surged within me. I knew what I was going to say.
God took over and took control, as what He does to those who are willing to be used by Him for His honor and glory. I opened my mouth and out came His Spirit of love, joy, peace, forgiveness, mercy. His Spirit of wisdom and understanding filled and overwhelmed me. While I was speaking, I understood that He had already been preparing me for that moment. All His revelations to me in all the past and recent retreats, conferences and spiritual discussions I’ve been involved in came out. His revelations came out like millions of puzzle pieces falling into place on this gigantic jigsaw puzzle. I could see my whole journey all so clearly. I walked again on the paths of the past, recalling my pain, my rebellion, my sins, my guilt and my shame; but I also relived God’s cleansing mercy, forgiveness, compassion, love and grace that shed light to all the suffering, pain and darkness.
My voice rang with renewed conviction as I understood the urgency of the moment for the salvation of souls. God desired so much to restore our souls to their original state–so beautiful, so radiant, so full of dignity, so part of Him.
I sank in my seat after my sharing. I cried. One sister cradled my head, the other held my arm. Through my tears and sobs, I heard the speaker say, "Sisters, God loves Rio so much, and He loves you the same way." I was so overwhelmed to be used by Him like that. It was so humbling…so loving. I once again understood St. Paul when he said that he would boast in his afflictions, for God’s power is strongest when we are weak.
So many women were deeply touched that day from all the talks and sharings by fellow women from different walks of life. I prayed that they would also begin their journey towards their healing, and if they were already on the path, find renewed strength and hope that day. May they submit themselves into the Healer’s Hands, so that they can fully live a pure and joyful life, and be vessels of His healing love to others.
And you know what’s shocking? So can you! Open your life to Our Lord Jesus Christ right now. Allow Him to take control. Let His healing light infuse your soul.
And live a pure, joyfilled life!
(Written in Sept. 2006)
